MaDD Blogger

How you doing?

Have you ever asked anyone how they are doing and actually have them tell you? I ran into an old friend of mine the other day who I hadn't seen in a while and asked how he was doing. He went on this long sad tale about losing his job and his mother falling down the stairs and breaking her hip and it just got worse. Me and my friend were trying to get away from him and he just followed us to the car and kept talking. Then I was at work and I asked this woman how she was doing. She was buying drinks and candy after all so she's gotta be harmless right? Turns out she had just gotten back from the hospital. Her son had been shot and she was taking a much needed break from siting at the hospital. A man walks in last week, one of my regular customers but he hadn't been in for a while so I stupidly asked the question and have regretted it ever since. He lost a good friend in a car wreck a few weeks back and he and his wife were going through a divorce.

Why do people dump their shit on complete strangers? Here's some things you need to know about me. The first is that I feel so disconnected from people that I can't relate in the slightest to their suffering. That probably comes from always being the unpopular one in class. I often sat alone in the lunch room and when I did sit with classmates I was invisible to them. I think that made me more reflective and watching people and how they interact with others has served me well over the years. I'm very good at faking compassion which is why I'm so good at customer service but in truth I'm an asshole. That's not a joke I never lie to people about what I am but I have customers tell me all the time how much they like me or that when they come to the store I'm their favorite cashier. I don't consider that to be a compliment by the way. That's like me going up to the trash man and saying "Hey man that other guy that worked for you last week, I don't like him. He seems like a real asshole. I'm glad you're back!". I have no more interest in being your favorite cashier than you have of being your postmans favorite stop and when I ask you how you are doing just say fine like everybody else and go on with your life. I don't really need to hear that you just got diagnosed with cancer or that your girlfriend went out with her friends last night got drunk and almost got raped by some asshole she met at the club. It's really none of my business.

Why don't you do what everybody else does and go dump on a bartender or a priest or here's an idea how about talking to a friend that actually gives a shit about you. My selling you 5 bucks worth of gas and a pack of smokes does not make us friends and neither does reading my name off of my name tag by the way. I always love it when complete strangers walk up to me and go "Hi Antonio, can I get 2 packs of Marlboro Lights please?". It's kind of rude and pretentious to address someone you don't know by their first name without at least introducing yourself in return. Do you have any idea how many people I wait on who know my name and I don't know theirs? I always end up running into these people at the supermarket and they're like "Hey Antonio!" and I'm like "Dude you've been coming in my store for over a year now who the fuck are you?" Anyway like I was saying, How are you doing?