MaDD Blogger

Ice 2: Electric Boogaloo

Yesterday I finally went to court over that ice theft bullshit that I wrote about a few weeks ago. I didn't want to go after all Alyce is the main witness and all I saw was the dumbasses burning rubber out of the parking lot. I had to get up early too, anyone that knows me knows that it's nearly impossible to get a hold of me before noon and we had to be at court at 8:30AM.

First we stopped at the police department to try and locate our two arresting officers Yates and Davis. There was this real asshole at the desk I shit you not but he told us to head to general sessions room 101. That bitch was packed! You ain't never seen this many motherfuckers in one place at one time and there wasn't a superbowl or concert or some other type of shit happening. Murfreesboro isn't even a third of the size that Nashville is but as I mentioned before we have experienced a major population increase here in the city and the court system still hasn't adjusted. Think of us Mayberry with about 100 times the people.

Remember when Andy Griffith would arrest someone and they would say "I have the right to a speedy trial and I want it now!" and then Andy would say "If you want a trial you will have to see the Justice of the Peace." and then the idiot would say "Yeah...okay I want to see the Justice of the Peace now!" and Andy would take the Sheriff sign off of his desk and replace it with the Justice of the Peace sign? Well that's how small town justice is in a sense and it's way too layed back. You've got a judge that's seeing 300 to 400 cases a day and now that we've added all of the immigrants into the mix we've had to hire interpreters to translate everything the judge says.

We walked around and finally found Davis talking with one of the thieves who had brought his daddy along with him. For the record 2 of the guys are still in jail after pleading guilty the other 2 got bailed out and were waiting for their court date. The night before the court date one of the two got arrested again which left us with daddy's little angel and of course daddy a used car salseman who felt like this was a ridiculous matter and it was just "Kids being kids." but then Davis spoke up and let daddy know what a monster his little angel really was what with the underage drinking and theft and all. Our thief was really pissed that we actually showed up too and was hoping that he would skate on the charges so nows he's whining that he needs more time to prepare and the court clerk has the brilliant idea to ask for something called a divergence. Of course this lying thieving bastard wants to try it so they file it. We sit there about 45 minutes and they called him up and the judge agrees to let this moron pull this bullshit. Now I've got to go to court again next month on this same bullshit. Ain't that a bitch?